Posts Tagged ‘wisdom’

Details TBD.

Posted in All Posts, Devotional Thoughts, tagged , , , , , on April 24, 2013 | 2 Comments »

She was talking to me…. Guest blog by Liz Hile, www.thewellbiblestudy.org Justdoit

“If you’re like me, sometimes you get a little frustrated that God doesn’t reveal His plan for your life to you in a tidy little 5-10 year prospectus.

Maybe you’ve read that God has good works he’s set aside specifically for you to do, but you’re still waiting on the memo that details what those things are!

In Judges 13, it seems that Samson’s dad felt like that, too.

You see, an angel of the Lord told Samson’s mom that Samson would be a Nazirite and gave her special instructions to follow. Samson’s dad prayed for the angel to return so that he could get some more specific details. He asked, “What’s Samson’s life gonna look like? What will his mission be?”

The angel’s response makes me laugh, “All that I commanded her (Samson’s mom) let her observe.”

It’s just like us to over-complicate things, isn’t it? God may not show us right away where we’re going, but He makes it very clear for us how to get there: just follow and obey. Do each day what you already know you should do – repent, be baptized, pray, serve, love, give, forgive, teach, make disciples, etc., and that’ll put you on a sure path towards greater revelation of God’s will for your life. When we love God enough to do what He’s already made plain in His Word, we can be confident that He will reveal even more of Himself to us (John 14:21), including His dreams, His vision, and His plans.

So, instead of getting frustrated about the murkiness of the future, let us patiently live out what God clearly wants us to do today.”

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Phases of Parenting

Posted in All Posts, Devotional Thoughts, Parenting, tagged , , , , , , , , , on March 7, 2013 | 2 Comments »

Imagine dividing up parenting into phases.  Andy Stanley* has suggested this breakdown:

Ages 1-5  Discipline

Ages 5-12 Training

Ages 12-18 Coaching

Ages 18+ Friendship

I’ve been thinking about this for a few weeks.  I have a 12-year-old middle schooler.  It’s crazy how suddenly she “grew up”.  It’s clearly a new phase of parenting.  We are shifting from “Mom decides” to “You decide with the help and influence of Mom”.  And on what basis is she making decisions?  On the basis of all the training I have provided (or not provided!) in the last 10 years.  Eeeekk.

Here are a few other bits of wisdom for the coaching years:

- If you fail to discipline and train your kids when they are young, then it’s too late.  You cannot suddenly add discipline when they are teenagers.  Doing so provokes rebellion and communication breakdown.

- You cannot “be friends” with your middle schooler.  You are the coach.  Coach is not the same as friend.

- “Don’t freak out.”  This is your mantra as long as you have teens in your house.  Don’t freak out.  Be calm.  If you freak out they will stop talking to you.  Don’t shut down the communication.  Leave them open to coaching.

- Say “Oh no, that’s terrible!  What are we going to do about that?”  See how you can use your words to communicate that you understand the drama and that you are on their side?  Then let them work out a solution.  Practice encouraging from the sidelines, not charging out into the middle of the field to sort things out.

- Remember that the most important things are not the urgent things.  (True for much of life!)  Do not allow seemingly urgent issues and activities replace the important things…

- Sometimes you say “no” to good things (sports, ministry, whatever) in order to invest more in your kids and have time with them.

- Don’t lie.  Don’t let them lie either.

- Teach them to honor their mother.

- Let them fail when the stakes are low.

- Help them see how their faith intersects three important things: 1. Decision making, 2. Relationships, and 3. School.  You can do this partly by talking all the time, everywhere, in a natural fashion about how your faith affects your thinking processes too.

- And finally remember that “Later is Longer”.  You have only a few short years of parenting, but you will be friends with your kids for 60 or more years.  Make the hard decisions now.  It’s ok to cry for a night.  Later is longer.  Always.

*Our Wednesday night dinner/small group has really enjoyed Andy Stanley’s “Future Family” series.  Session 5 he co-taught with his wife and they discussed parenting. http://www.northpoint.org/messages/future-family

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Sex – The Central Issue in Christian Morality?

Posted in All Posts, Devotional Thoughts, tagged , , , , , , , , , on August 13, 2012 | 2 Comments »

I have been watching current social and political debates on sexuality issues with some degree of curiosity, horror, and shame.

Last week I re-read C.S. Lewis’ “Mere Christianity”, which was first published in 1952.  It was taken from a series of radio addresses he gave at Oxford from 1942-1944.  At the end of the section titled “Sexual Morality” he writes,

“Finally, though I have had to speak at some length about sex, I want to make it as clear as I possibly can that the centre of Christian morality is not here.  If anyone thinks that Christians regard unchastity as the supreme vice, he is quite wrong.  The sins of the flesh are bad, but they are the least bad of all sins.  All the worst pleasures are purely spiritual: the pleasure of putting other people in the wrong, of bossing and patronising and spoiling sport, and back-biting; the pleasures of power, of hatred.  For there are two things inside me, competing with the human self which I must try to become.  They are the Animal self, and the Diabolical self.  The Diabolical self is the worse of the two.  That is why a cold, self-righteous prig who regularly goes to church may be far nearer to hell than a prostitute.  But, of course, it is better to be neither.”

Timeless wisdom.  Convicting.

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The Know-It-All Tongue (#15)

Posted in All Posts, Taming the Tongue, tagged , , , , , , on May 19, 2012 | 4 Comments »

“While God desires for us to have many of His attributes, omniscience is not one of them.  He is the only one who knows everything… and all wisdom and knowledge come from Him.”

Not only did our author make me laugh – she’s exactly right!

Here’s something I really hate - unsolicited advice.  Someone who presumes they know exactly what I need to do, hear, and be.  They tend to not listen well and they rarely let you finish what you were saying before they jump in with some recommendation for you.

Know-it-alls make me want to run away.  I avoid sitting near them.  They tend to make me cynical – LOL.

On the other hand, maybe I am that way sometimes.

Just to be sure that I don’t turn into a Know-It-All, I am going to try to follow the advice in our little book:

  • Do not correct anyone unless it is a matter of major importance.
  • When corrected, refuse to become defensive or try to prove you are right.
  • Talk less, a lot less.
  • Ask more questions.  Let other people talk. Actively listen to their ideas.
  • Let someone else have the joy of explaining something to you.

“Wise people do not make a show of their knowledge.” Proverbs 12:23 NLT

—

30 Days to Taming Your Tongue, a Bible study by Deborah Pegues

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What Defines You?

Posted in All Posts, Book Reviews, tagged , , , , , , , , on February 28, 2012 | 1 Comment »

Today’s guest blog is written by Jimmie Davis, girls’ minister and author.  She’s also one of the most humble women of God you’ll ever meet. http://blogs.lifeway.com/blog/girlsministry/

While I was at LifeWay for a conference two years ago, Pam Gibbs handed me the book Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership by Ruth Haley Barton, and told me it was a “must read” for anyone in ministry. I read a few chapters and it was extremely convicting, so I politely put it away not to pick it up again until a few months ago. Since that time, the Lord has used this book to remind me that who I am personally is intricately interwoven into my ministry with teenage girls, but my ministry does not define me.

In the book, Ruth uses the life of Moses as a prime example. She points out that growing up Moses didn’t really know if he was an Egyptian or a Hebrew. He didn’t really know who his mama was and certainly was confused at the deep compassion he felt for the injustices shown to the Hebrew people even though he was raised as an Egyptian, the son of Pharaoh’s daughter. Moses’ built-up anger over his life’s circumstances came out when he saw an Egyptian being cruel to a Hebrew and his rage turned into murder. Moses fled to the desert and had to spend forty years in solitude with God to let the dust settle so he could clearly see and settle his identity crisis. Finally when Moses had spent enough time in silence, God called and he was ready to listen. Moses’ personality, his handicap, his upbringing, his heritage, and his very own story equipped him to go and face Pharaoh, lead the Hebrew children out of bondage, survive in the dessert for forty more years, and fulfill God’s plan for his life.

I’m not saying you have to spend forty years in silence; what person can do that, really? However, I have learned that spending time in solitude before God will allow the dust to settle and you will be able to see who you are and hear God’s call of leadership. In times of solitude, God will remind you that you are not defined by your ministry, but you are defined by His presence in your life. Solitude in the presence of God on your leadership journey will keep you close to Him and that is completely satisfying.

The book also points out that God led Moses to the top of Mount Nebo and showed him the Promised Land. God told him that he could see it, but he would never go there. No argument, no response; Moses was completely satisfied. Barton says, “He no longer needed a role, a task, or responsibility to define him. For him, the presence of God was his promised land.”

This is a painful reality in ministry. We might have a great vision for girls’ ministry and serve long and hard, but for some reason God removes us from our place of service. Like Moses, maybe someone else will come in and take your vision to a new and different level. When the presence of God defines you, there will be no argument, no response; you will be completely at peace with whatever circumstance comes your way. I encourage you to seek Him in solitude today—for that is the place where the peace comes.

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What Teens Can’t Learn from You Tube

Posted in All Posts, Discipleship Tools, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , on February 14, 2012 | Leave a Comment »

Great discipleship metaphor!!

Guest blog today from Courtney Veasey who blogged today on Lifeway’s “Inside Girl’s Ministry” at http://blogs.lifeway.com/blog/girlsministry/

Does God ever speak to you while you are driving?

I have found that when I actually have the radio turned down low enough and am not giving a personal concert to others in traffic around me, that God does speak to me in the car. This recently happened to me during my visit home to Florida for Christmas. Santa had indeed visited our family, and with cars packed full of new gifts and old suitcases, I lead the brigade as my family caravanned back to my dad’s house from where we had spent the holidays. The road we were all traveling on was long and winding as it went through the backwoods of North Florida, and I had gotten far ahead of the pack. Suddenly I came upon every speed demon’s nightmare… a state trooper, tucked sneakily behind the brush. Thankfully I was going the speed limit and he didn’t pull me over, but not wanting any of my other family members to get caught by the trap, I called those following to let them know what was ahead.

As I continued on my drive that day, the Lord began to show me how this situation could easily relate to speaking truth into the lives of teen girls and younger women. All of us are on this journey down the long and winding roads of life, but I just happen to be in a place that is a little bit further down the road than younger girls, and I can see some of the traps and dangers that they could find themselves in if they are not aware. Sometimes we can make discipleship seem more difficult than it really is. We come up with excuses for not speaking truth into the lives of girls: “They won’t listen,” “I can’t relate to them,” and so on. But sometimes discipleship can be as easy as sharing stories of your experiences on life’s journey, helping girls to be aware of situations that they should both embrace and avoid along the way.

Never doubt how much they really need your human touch and life experiences shared with them. Sure, with a click of a button, today’s teen girls can learn how to style their hair in different ways or make culinary masterpieces. But there are just some truths about life and the faith that they can’t get from YouTube. They can only get it from YOU.

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Praying for Your Husband

Posted in All Posts, Book Reviews, Discipleship Tools, tagged , , , on May 11, 2011 | Leave a Comment »

How much do you pray for your husband? I mean REALLY pray for him? Are your prayers for him mostly reactive, driven by the crisis – the after the fight, someone made a mistake, hope he doesn’t get killed jumping out of a plane today – kind of prayers? Have you ever considered being proactive in your prayers for your husband – coming to God on your husband’s behalf before the crisis, praying for his protection, wisdom, guidance, character development, etc. ?

Many of you know that my husband retired this month from the U.S. Army. He has enjoyed a fascinating and fulfilling career that has spanned 29 years and engagements during peace and war on several continents. (The challenges of our journey to retirement will probably fill several more blog posts!) This chapter, or rather entire section, of the book that is our lives is drawing to a close.

So much of a man’s identity is often tied up in his work. His sense of purpose, his capacity to provide, his fulfillment, his sense of accomplishment and success in life – it’s all tied up in his career. Granted, to the degree that a wise Christian man is grounded in the Lord, the “My Identity Is My Career” effect can be tempered… but it never disappears completely!

I have been wondering and praying about this dramatic shift in my husband’s career and how it might affect his self confidence, sense of purpose, and direction in life. God gave me an idea in the quiet of my quiet time one morning. (You know that part of your daily time with God should involve you being quiet before Him so He can speak to you, right?!)

I have decided to work my way through Stormie Omartian’s book The Power of a Praying Wife this month. It’s a 30 day commitment to praying proactively for my husband. I am asking the Lord to help me see my husband through His eyes, and all his potential for greatness. I am asking the Lord to help me be a positive influence on my husband, to love, protect, encourage, support, and understand him better. I want to be his true helpmate, his companion, support and friend. I am working my way through the chapters and guided prayers regarding his work, finances, sexuality, temptations, mind, fears, purpose, choices, health, protection, trials, integrity, reputation, priorities, relationships, fatherhood, attitude, emotions, repentance, obedience, self-image, faith, and his future (and a few more I left out).

Consider joining me – pray proactively for your husband – and see what the Lord will do in your heart and in his life.

“The wisewoman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.” Proverbs 14:1

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